After an interesting conversation I had with a complete stranger (really rather ignorant, this one) on youtube (don't ask, long story and I'm not all that proud of how I behaved) I would like to tell y'all what self harm is not. Now I realize that what I am about to say will not apply to every one who self harms... for some self harm might be all these things. For others self harm may be some of these things and not others. However, it has been shown, that for most people who self harm these stereotypical ideas about self harm do not apply.
So, without further a due…
What Self Harm Is Not
Self harm (in and of itself) is not a suicidal act:Rather, studies have found that often, self harm is a means of AVOIDING suicide (I myself have used it as such). Those who self harm may also feel that it is a way of temporarily relieving intense feelings (perhaps feelings they can not identify), pressure, or anxiety, being real, live, or just feeling SOMETHING, of experiencing the pain on the inside on the outside, a means of controlling and managing pain (where as the pain experienced on the inside may feel uncontrollable), or way breaking an emotional numbness (that feeling of complete and utter numbness... of nothing... of being more dead than alive).
Self harm is not an attention seeking behavior:Most individuals who self harm go to great lengths to hide their SH from others. Wearing long sleeves or pants when it is hot out is one way that those who self harm will try and hide it from others. Self harm is, more often than not, a private act. Because it is so taboo in our culture our shame is often what causes us to hide it.
Self harm is not is not a manipulative tactic:Self harm is not done for manipulation purposes. Self harm is a coping mechanism that some individuals have developed when nothing else has worked.
Self harm is not just a teenage girl problem:While the average age that individuals start to self harm is in their early teens, self harm can start at any time in a persons life regardless of gender, race, sexual orientation, or religion. I started cutting in my early 20's. I know men who self harm. It is a problem that can affect anyone.
More when I find/come up with it :-)
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